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When we go through a difficult period in our lives, it can lead us to a number of questions. Why is this happening to me? How long will it last? What can I do to make the pain end? Maybe it’s a painful breakup, a soul crushing job, or the loss of a friend. We know on some level that we must go through a process in order to move on. We have to work through our emotions and find a path forward.
"What can I do to make the pain end?"
Luckily, the kabbalists offer answers to all of these questions that we ask ourselves in challenging times, as well as solutions for getting through them faster.
1. Look for the lesson.
The kabbalists teach that our lives, including all of the blessings and challenges we experience, are perfectly designed to help us transform and reach a higher spiritual level. The reason we go through difficulties is to teach us specific lessons that we have not yet learned.
Have you ever noticed that people seem to fall into certain traps over and over again? People go from one bad job to another or from one bad relationship to the next. These patterns continue to appear until we learn the lesson we are meant to learn. Someone who continually has trouble at work might need to learn that they aren’t taking their job seriously enough. Likewise, someone who has relationship trouble might need to realize that they settle for the first person that shows them attention, because they feel a lack of worth.
The pain will end the moment we learn the lesson and break the pattern. The faster we find out what the message is for us, the faster we end the process and get to our next level of fulfillment.
2. Ask the Creator to aid in your transformation.
Learning the lessons we are meant to learn is much easier said than done. It requires us to be honest with ourselves and devoted to transforming ourselves. But we don’t have to do it alone! We can ask the Creator to help us.
It is often tempting to ask the Creator to remove our obstacles and take our pain away. The problem with this is that removing the challenge does not teach us the lesson we need to learn. So instead, we can ask the Creator to show us the lesson and help us transform ourselves. When we ask the Creator to help us change for the better – to become more patient, more giving, more understanding – we create an opening for the Creator to show us the way forward.
3. Take ownership of your mistakes.
As we continue to work on ourselves and concentrate on transformation, we often start to recognize our own negativity to a new degree. We start realizing that we are more selfish than we originally thought or that we really need to work on our patience, for instance. Instead of feeling bad about ourselves, seeing our negativity is actually something to get excited about it! How do we know what areas we need to work on until we know where the problems are? Seeing our negativity is a blessing. In fact, the negativity itself is a gift from the Creator. It’s nothing to feel ashamed or guilty about. By doing our spiritual work and striving to transform, we enable more positivity and blessings to enter our lives.
No one is perfect. We would all love to immediately learn those important lessons we need to learn without having to go through a painful process. There are times, however, when we just don’t get it – and so the universe shakes us up a bit to help. The more we can recognize these moments as our golden opportunity to ask for guidance and take ownership, the faster we can transform ourselves and leave the painful process behind.
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